what i have learnt about happiness

certain recent events have led me to wondering what it is that truly makes one happy, and how much we are willing to sacrifice in order to be happy.

someone very close to me, whom i love has recently found themselves in a situation where they need to choose between temporary loneliness for the chance when happiness will ultimately follow indefinately. or a life filled with patterns of heartache loneliness and anxiety, followed by moments of happiness, love and belonging. for me the answer seems so clear. rather remove yourself from a unstable environment where happiness is fickle and heartache is unavoidable and suffer a few months of sadness then live a life of roller coaset emotions. i am sad to announce this person has chosen the latter. they are willing to sacrifice their happiness for those fickle moments of love with this specific other.

now being in a long term relationship of nearly four years, i understand what it is like to feel as though you have given everything to someone and leaving them seems impossible. but i don't believe i would stay if i knew my happiness was going to be in someone else's control for the rest of my life. it is my happiness, ultimately my sanity, i want control of it.

which brings me to this. our happiness should be in our own hands. no one else has the ability to climb inside of our minds and control what we think. if something makes you sad, makes you anxious or feel worthless - get rid of it! yeah. if only it were that simple you might think. well it is. life is way too short to allow ourselves to be controlled by another.

happiness is sanity. and sanity is what we need in order to have a shot of happiness. happiness is what we need to get through this life. and life. it is what we need in order to live.